Life this week has been hectic. I feel like a stickshift car being driven by a new driver. One of my coworkers from Longview is here until tomorrow to prepare for a conference in Tanzania next week. Since I am not a P&O what I can do is limited and I feel like I'm in the way. I hear about all the frustration people around me have working with Kenyans, but right now I see mostly potential, not faults. I may feel differently later but for now I'm torn between two worlds.
This week I started trying to cook Kenyan food. I started with Ugali. Flop. It tasted more like cold grits. This morning I made Chapati. Success. They turned out pretty well and my coworkers are impressed! =)
I really want to be of use to those around me, yet when I tried this morning to modify a knee for use with extension assist cords, I flopped. The file slipped and instead of a nice groove, I nicked off a corner of the small barrier on one side. Babu (Kenyan name for my LIMBS Coworker) said I should have been going slower and been more careful. It seems for me in life, I am either too fast or too slow never just right. Yes, I am upset/discouraged right now. I do not want to disappoint those who sent me here. I want to show I can do a good job, yet every time I try, it seems like I fail.
I don't know what God is teaching me, but I hope I learn it soon.
I enjoy working with Kenyans. They are patient and understanding when I make mistakes.
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