Burnout and Recovery

The last 3 months were a haze. I basically worked on autopilot from mid-November until mid December. Anyone who knows me well knows that I can be EXTREMELY stubborn. However, even I had to admit I was burning out. I didn't realize how burned out I was until later.

Isn't it funny that God always has a plan even when we don't see it? Due to finances, I was unable to go to the USA for the holidays this year. Instead, I went to Rwanda to visit one of my best friends from when I was growing up. She works as the librarian in an international school in Kigali. But wait, I am getting ahead of myself.

2014 was a hard year for me. I was told that if the LIMBS work did not pick up here, then LIMBS would pull out of Kenya. I did not want to see that happen. There are too many people in need of legs, but not adequate networking to reach them yet. But no matter how much networking I did, there was little improvement. Yes, we trained more technologists about how to use the LIMBS system, but the going was slow. In fact, the strain in relations between LIMBS (me) and the orthopedic department at CURE reached an all time high. It felt like the LIMBS program was in ICU all year. BUT GOD had a plan! Just as I was preparing to close down the program in Kenya, God provided a new lead. Another nonprofit heard about LIMBS and wanted to partner with us to get above knee prosthetic legs to those who need them most in remote areas of East Africa. I met several times with the gentleman who contacted us (LIMBS) and there is hope. Then the week before CURE slowed down for the holidays, the head of the orthopedic workshop, the one giving me so much trouble, was forced to leave CURE; maybe there is hope for CURE after all. (I felt guilty that I was so relieved at his departure) After all the uncertainty over the last 11 months, I was drained. My goal became make it to December 12th.

I did, of course. My home church in North Carolina, Providence Baptist Church (PBC), sent a team (which included my sister, Martha) to Kenya for a week starting on the 12th December. Very little happens work wise from the middle of December until the beginning of January, so I was able to join the team during the time they were in Kenya. They came up Friday afternoon/evening, December 12th, and I joined them the next morning.

We spent Saturday distributing Christmas bags to those in Kijabe hospital (the hospital next to the one we're I am stationed),starting with the children's ward, then working our way through the maternity, women's, and men's wards. I was so excited spending time with these children (and later adult patients) and talking to them, that I forgot to take many pictures. The smiles on their faces were priceless. I think my favorite part of the day was ministering to those that the world considers the hardest; the young Muslim lady who had just had a miscarriage, the woman that was almost non responsive in the high dependency

Giving out gifts

unit, the boy with a chest tube and suction, the old woman with mental limitations that just wanted a "dolly" to hold, and the young paraplegic lady who was in the hospital because she had pressure sores from sitting in an inappropriate wheelchair for so long. These are the patients that impacted me the most. However, I think the hardest ward for the entire team was the men's ward. This was the last ward we went into and also the smelliest. I have to go in there from time to time for my LIMBS work or when helping the orthopedic department fit a spinal brace, but the stench still gets to me. Picture a rundown nursing home, the stench of urine and other bodily fluids permeates everything. I get used to it over time, but I still remember the first time I visited. The team invited me to join them for dinner and gave me the suitcase containing gifts and things from my parents and the Berean Sunday School class.

The next morning we all went down to one of the small African Inland churches in the valley below Kijabe. Little did I know, this was the church one of CURE's guards had invited me to and where he was pastor. Needless to say, he was very excited to see me. In Kenya, guests are invited to introduce themselves during the service. Well..... He singled me out and introduced me himself from the pulpit. Can you say embarrassed? I was only trying to be part of the team, no one special but I was singled out! Anyway, Pastor George, the mission pastor at PBC and team leader of the team, preached and afterwards the church fed us the best nyama choma (roasted meat, Turkana style) I ever had. After picking up our bags in Kijabe, off we went to Nairobi. The afternoon was spent resting and preparing for the next day.

Pastor George is such a considerate man and he decided to room my sister and I together while we were in Nairobi. I wasn't sure how it would work out, but it was definitely a blessing. Martha taught me how to use FaceTime on my new IPad mini (a gift from my parents so I could read more books), set up a call with my other sister Rachel, and the time alone allowed us to debrief on each other without offending anyone else on the team. I love my sisters so much and am very impressed with what wonderful wise women they have become. (Now I just have to figure out how to stop mothering them and just be a sister and friend)

After and quick breakfast Monday morning, we headed to Nairobi Language Institute in Kalangware for a one-day VBS program. I was originally supposed to help with the crafts, but instead I helped with the youngest group where an extra set of hands were needed. After the program, we helped serve food and wash dishes for those in the feeding program. The ladies in the kitchen were very sweet and one of the cooks, Theresia, even sent me with greeting to take back to the spiritual department at CURE. You see, the week before the PBC team was there, Theresia was working in another part of Kalengware with an evangelism team from CURE. Small world!

The next two days we spent on the outskirts of Kibera, the second largest slum in the world. The hardest part on this site were the numbers. We had planned on around 150-200 kids and instead all the kids in the neighborhood tried to join and we had closer to 350 kids. What made it so hard was we only had craft materials for 200 kids but we didn't want to keep kids from hearing the Word of God. By the beginning of the second day, we had revised our plans and the program went much more smoothly. 

This is Caleb. He was 3 years old when I
first met him. Now he is 14!

The last day, Thursday, we went a couple of hours outside Nairobi to conduct a one day VBS at a Bible Club. That day I remembered to take more pictures because there was not enough room in our, my sister and I's, craft room. I feel like I am losing my touch with kids. Martha is SO much better than I am!

Some of these kids were very creative with their stickers!

After VBS,we returned to the guest house. I had packed earlier the night before because due to some miscommunication my flight to Rwanda was almost 24 hours after the rest of the team flew out and I needed to catch up with a friend I was going to stay with before dark.

The place where I was meeting my friend's mother was surprisingly close and inexpensive to get to. The taxi cost about $8. This was really a blessing because I was taking a rather large suitcase to Rwanda and I was not looking forward to carrying it on the matatus.

I had a wonderful time with my friend and her family. I even got to meet her fiancée. Friday evening I went to the airport and took my flight to Rwanda. The adventure begins......

Rwanda is an hour behind Kenya and the landscape is very different. There is a reason it is called the "Land of a Thousand Hills." Right now, many foreign investors are pouring lots of money into this country and you can tell. The road are flat, well paved, and well maintained. There is no trash on the streets. Because the French and Belgium first colonized Rwanda, everyone drives on the right side of the road. When I got there Rwanda had just gotten some rain so everything was green and lush looking. 

Katharina, one of my best friends, met me at the airport and as soon as we arrived at her townhouse, I went to bed. Saturday morning we relaxed and stopped by the Library at the school to check on some things and check out a couple books. Having a friend who is a librarian has some advantages, she can find books that catch your attention and keep it to the last page, even if you are not big on reading. Over the next two weeks, I read six books. Saturday evening we went to the "mall" and ate dinner before going to see Night at the Museum 3 in the theatre. By eating at a certain place before the movie, we received vouchers to see the movie free. Win-win situation!

Early the next morning, we met the driver we hired and headed to Nyungwe National Forest, the largest rainforest left in Africa. It took almost all day to get there because we stopped at a couple museums and the Kings palace replica on the way. That night we had a little church service among ourselves huddled in blankets. Boy was it cold at night! 

Monday morning we headed off to see the waterfalls. Although it was rainy, we throughly enjoyed the hike and seeing all the flora along the path. We got to see touracos which love the rain and hear many other types of birds. On the way back to the entrance we had the opportunity to talk to our guide about Christ. He is a catholic and believes as long as he goes to the confessional every week and confesses his sins to the priest, he will be saved. We were able to explain that it is not what we do or have done that gets us to heaven but what Christ did for us. I don't remember what I said or how I was able to hike up hill while talking the whole time, but God gave me the words and the strength to do it!

The next morning, we went on the canopy walk. As the name suggests, part of this hike is located on suspension bridges stretched over the valley. The scenery is beautiful and the sky was clearer that day. We heard many birds, one of which was called a tinker bird. After the canopy walk, we headed back towards Kigali.

This is the only picture I have at the memorial.
The sign in the foreground shows where the french
played volley ball. The sign in the background marks
the mass grave where the murdered Tutsi were buried.

On the way we stopped by a genocide memorial. It should have been a technical college not a slaughterhouse. During that visit I learned a lot about the Rwandan genocide. For one, it could have been prevented. The genocide was not a random act, it was carefully planned and administered. Also, the genocide did not happen in a day or even a week. It lasted months. Trouble stirred up by the Belgiums and leading political party at the time can be traced back to more than a year before what we know as the genocide. Many Hutus were pressured into murdering their Tutsi neighbors or face torture and death themselves along with their families. And the West did nothing to stop it. In fact, the memorial site we visited was supposed to be a safe haven for the Tutsis, at least that's what they were told, instead it was used to round up all the Tutsis into one place to torture, slaughter, and mass bury them. Now the Tutsi and the Hutu are two tribes right? WRONG! The difference between a Hutu and a Tutsi was the length and with of their nose and the diameter of their head. That's all. In fact, two Hutus could have a Tutsi. Almost a year after the genocide, the mass graves at this site were dug up and the dead were buried with dignity. I can see now just how close Kenya came to the same fate after the 2007 elections. But Rwanda is rebuilding. Twenty years after the end of the genocide, Rwanda is a united nation. Tourism is booming. The wild animals that were poached to extinction in Rwanda are slowly being replaced as much as possible. Within the next few years, they plan to buy a lion for the game park (more on the park later).

After we got back to Kigali, we spent the evening with some of Katharina's 

co-workers and friends watching Elf then Die Hard (it takes place at Christmas so it must be a Christmas movie, right?). We went to the Christmas Eve and Christmas morning service at Katharina's church and I even got to hear a special arrangement where Katharina played the flute.

After church on Christmas, we went to a potluck brunch and later Katharina and I exchanged gifts, relaxed, and built a puzzle.

Completed puzzle

The following weekend we took a bus to Gisini on the coast of Lake Kivu. Inzu Lodge were we stayed was gorgeous! We stayed in a safari tent with two cot beds and electricity. The view from our porch outside the tent was amazing. We just relaxed, read, and rested. It was about this time I started feeling alive and refreshed again. We returned to Kigali two nights later.

Our Tent

My Bed

View of Lake Kivu from our tent

View of the lake during a walk

New Year's Eve we went up to Akagara National Game Park Reserve. During the genocide, poachers from Tanzania came into the park and killed all the rhinos and elephants. After the genocide the locals in the area killed off all the lions because they feared for their livestock. Now, the country is repopulating the game reserve while working with the locals on conservation measures. Akagara National park is small but contains more diversity than you can find in many other places. The park has woodlands, bush lands, marsh lands, and savannah. The biodiversity allows a large number of different animals to live and thrive within this small area. Since reintroducing elephants to the park several years ago, the elephant herd has grown to over a hundred. We saw topi (they look like antelope in blue jeans), antelope, zebra, giraffe, Cape buffalo, wildebeest, water buck, and a small terrapin (a turtle that lives on land and in the water). 

Hippos

Crocodile

See the three little babies?

Guinea Fowl

                                                                    Topi (see the blue jeans?)

Velvet monkey

Waterbuck

On dry land at last!

Our little turtle

Storks

When we got back to Kigali, we were tired and by 9pm we were asleep. I know, I know, we were spoilsports for not staying up until midnight but we left the house at 4:50am that morning. New Year's Day we slept in. Later we started a puzzle. I never got to finish it before I left to return to Kenya but Katharina finished it after I left. 

Katharina took me to the airport late Saturday morning. Everything in that airport took forever. The check in desk only had one working computer for three flights. Immigration has two agents working with really slow computers. Then security had two short baggage scanners for three flights. But I made my flight. Two others weren't so blessed. The flight attendants held the flight as long as they could, but in the end, we had to leave without them. Did I mention that a third to half the flight consisted of minors? In fact, out of the six exit row seats available, four were originally assigned to minors. I don't envy that flight attendant's job of reseating and rearranging everyone! Ten to twelve of the passengers on the flight were students from RVA. This was actually a double blessing because it made getting my checked bag easier and the RVA guy meeting them offered to take my large suitcase back to Kijabe for me. (Remember how I don't Ike trying to drag it around on matatus?) The same friend who dropped me off at the airport, picked me up. After stopping by her house and getting cleaned up, we had a nice night out with another friend.

After much debating, she convinced me to return to Kijabe early Monday morning instead of Sunday afternoon. We spent the evening with her future in-laws making chapatis and throughly enjoying ourselves. 

Although I did stop by my house to drop off my other luggage and change clothes, I was at work by 8:30am Monday morning. I spent last week and this starting everything with LIMBS back up and running again. The country is just now starting to get back up and running after the holidays.

So now you are mostly up to date and have heard all the good news. 

Here are my challenges for the future:

• I am currently under supported financially. Due to different situations, my support went down $70 a month. I was already low on financial support before, now I am REALLY low. Please pray for God's provision!

• I still don't exactly know what is in store for me this year. There are opportunities but also many obstacles. Pray for wisdom and discernment. One of my bosses is planning to come sometime in February. Pray everything goes well during his visit.

• I get lonely sometimes. Please pray for God's comfort during those times. 

If you feel led to give financially you can either donate online here and writing, "Elizabeth Flow Support" in the memo line or to send a check (with "Elizabeth Flow Support" in the memo line) to:
LIMBS International 
500 W. Overland, Suite 230
El Paso, Texas 79901

THANK YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!